Paralyzed in thought. Not so much by fear but by lack of emotion.
There is a need…for something, for anything that will make me feel again.
I always hated when people said they were depressed.
How fucking hard is it to smile? Or to just laugh?
But I think that I may understand now.
Everything is not fun anymore.
Even my favorite things bring no satisfaction, not that they ever did?…did they?
So I sit. Constantly streaming variables through my mind. It all seems hopeless.
Where is this God? My god?
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